For the ages

When I was 2 my mom already had 7 kids and I was number six. I guess I was like Addy but even more extreme when it came to loving strangers. One Sunday I saw this older couple sitting behind us and I tried to climb over the bench to get to them. The woman caught my moms eye and asked if she could take me to sit with them. My mom quickly nodded. That day started a friendship between this couple and my family that lasted over 24 years. George and Ruth Oxford became grandparents to us, and I can say during my early years I probably spent more time with them than my own family. My parents even named my youngest brother after George. All my siblings spent time with the Oxfords but my younger siblings and I especially did because my mom had to do a lot of substitution (teaching) and we were to young to be in school so Ruth and George took care of us 3-4 times a week. I could talk about how amazing they both were, but I'd be here forever. Let's just say we begged to go to their house everyday and cried when we had to leave, we'd fake being sick just to spend the night and Ruth would always convince my mom to let us stay I think that was the biggest thing someone who wanted you all the time, who loved having you around, taking you places buying you things just because they loved you so much. When I was in the 7th grade my Dad woke me up before early morning basketball to tell me that Big George had passed away. I was sick. I still tear up remembering the way I felt, I had loved him. I remember that Ruth had bought me a snow white book and with a pencil we had named all the characters. I was snow white. Ruth was a dear. Dad was Doc, Mom was Happy, Vaughn Grumpy, Clara Dopey, etc But my prince, my prince was George. Worse than the funeral was the decision. George's brothers and he had bought their property together and they both wanted to move back to Phoinex, Ruth's children wanted her to move back too. I remember not being able to sleep thinking I was going to loose my Ruthie too. But Ruth would not leave us. She and my parents talked and she bought a manufactured home and my parents put it on our property, she was not only staying but was on our property!!!! Ruth needed us kids to get through her grief and to keep her busy she truly did love us. Ruth was our champion! I once remember getting stuck at a friends house (who was a boy) and his parents were gone and my ride had left because my friend was going to take me home after we finished a movie. He forgot his car was in the shop and it was nearing 2 am. I tried calling my parents but no one answered, my friend (scared of my dad) started freaking out saying I couldn't stay there I called Ruth woke her up and she without question jumped in her car to save me, she was always there for me. Because Ruth never seemed to age I think I thought her invincible and was in disbelief when I got the call a year ago that Ruth was in the hospital and that they had found an aggressive tumor in her brain. It was cancer, my Ruthie was dying. She also lost a lot of herself, she never talked anymore and I could see that she was pained. We did have glimpes of her in the early months after her surgery and I foolishly thought that she'd get better, I wanted to believe it though I knew that the odds weren't good. She slowly deteriorated into someone who was helpless and unhappy. My parents suffered too. Taking care of her for almost a year and I know that my mother was breaking slowly. She hates seeing things like this because her own mother died from cancer and slowly like Ruth and she was hurting to see her friend like that, but like always my mom just sucked it up and worked hard. Ruth was ready to die and right before my youngest sister (Ruth's "baby") was leaving on her mission she came home by this time Ruth wasn't talking but when Lillie walked in Ruth smiled then my mom said she stopped eating and drinking, she was ready to die. And a few days later she did. The funeral was quite the experience for me it was on my 26th birthday and wasn't what I wanted to do. The day of my sisters and mom found out we were supposed to sing, a half hour before we ran through the song twice. "Each life that touches ours for good" The words were emotional but while I sang I had such a spiritual experience, I felt angels all around me and I could hear singing, it was so beautiful and I was so grateful for that gift. I also was struggling during the funeral, I was having a hard time recalling memories of Ruth and I wanted to remember all the good things about her, I said a quick prayer and immediately my mind was flooded with a memories of our life together. Ruth teaching me to make donuts, helping me feed a calf, brushing my hair, etc It was so special, I started crying out of thanks for that and for the woman that helped shape me into who I am. She was an amazing woman, truly a woman for the ages. I will miss her but I am so glad she is with George and that she is watching over her "kids" and waiting for the day we can be together again.

Ruth with Addy and Katelyn, so glad she got to know Addy.

After her surgery during Clara's wedding time.
Ruth with Liam in her last few months.